parents versus the world

My youngest boy is 8 going on 15, he scares me, seriously scares me with his attitude, his knowledge of the world, his fears.

Last night I seriously lost it with him, I lost my temper, I'm just sick of me and Tanya being the worst parents in the world, its horrible to love your child and see them corrupted by the world, I was talking to him, about eating properly, he told me he didn't want to be fat, because you don't look good (thanx mate), he is an 8yr old boy. He told me is scared of everyone dying ( who has put this in his head), he told me his friends are like family, they make him happy, he needs the computer, he has to have a girlfriend. Nothing is good enough, nobody cares, he never gets things he wants. He is 8.

Well thats it, I have had enough, we are chucking the world out for Mason for a while, we are going to mollycuddle him, we are going to wrap him up in cotton wool and remind him that he is a child, the love in this home comes first.

I am sad, I am ashamed, I feel like I have failed.

I said to Mason last night, after I had calmed down, I didn't want him feeling sorry for himself, not to feel ashamed, to start afresh, free of the crap before.

I said that to him, and I know it is what my Father in Heaven wants me to do in my life as well, its hard, to be in the wrong, and then let it go, to sin and face life as is we are clean. Well I am clean, I am free, because like my child, he says to me, 'you know you have done wrong' but I want you to live in fullness, free, starting afresh. forgiven. It is not an excuse to sin with impunity, and believe me God sees the heart, so give it all, be honest to him, and then step forward, fresh, free, unashamed. living in fullness.

Its hard this parenting, I'm not very good at it, but I have Tanya to help me, and the greatest parent of all always with me.

My oldest boy, Morgan, is in a chess tournament today, I really pray he enjoys himself, and Mason gets some time to spend with his mum( I'm at work). Pray!!!