This is me in a ladies swim suit, I don't dress like this very often, only at fancy dress parties actually, so don't worry. I don't really mind looking this strange, in fact, standing out in a crowd is something I am quite comfortable with.
There are many other things I am not comfortable with, and if you knew me, you would be surprised to find out that I am quite shy, I can be awkward, proud, patronising and intimidating, all things I am working on, I strive against and try to get over myself. One of the biggest problems I have first thing in the morning, is the fact I do not want anyone around me, I am rude and moody and until I am awake I am not nice. This has been a bit more problematic lately as Tanya and I have been getting up earlier to pray, I find I just read my bible for a while and ignore Tanya, until I am ready to speak, probably not good, and probably missing the point, something to work on.
What amazes me and something I believe I still struggle with is the fact that God loves me with all of the rubbish, He still loves me, when I mess up, He still loves me, when I am unemployed and have not done anything all day and feel a bit useless, I cannot justify myself, nothing I can do can make Him love me more or less. I am accepted and loved.
It is a loud declaration I make, because that is what makes me who I am, the fact that I am loved and have been given life, now I have to work on enjoying it.
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